Thursday, December 08, 2005

Celebrity Gossip

One topic that unfortunately receives no coverage on other blogs these days, is celebrity gossip. Today's Post will seek to rectify that situation.

We all know everybody's favorite celebrity. But did you know that those rumors that he is giving up Scientology are true? This blog is proud to give the Cold Hard Facts on the matter.
According to his spokesman, Tom Cruise said:
Well, you know when you get down to it, the whole thing seemed kind of silly. So I decided to practice something much more sensible: Cabalogy. You know, the weird stuff Madonna is always doing? Well now I get to do it also. And the best part? My sales representative expects "Tom Cruise's Red Ribbons" to sell 100 times better than "Tom Cruise's E-Meters" And, of course with a wife and child, I'm going to need all the money I could get.

According to "Rabbi" Yochanan Greenfeld, leader in cabalogy:
It just proves it. 9/10 acolytes choose Kabbalah over all the other leading cults.

What do Tom Cruise's fellow scientologists have to say?
Ah, if only he had reached the 402nd plane of knowledge, Then all his questions would be answered.

This blog concurs. And with that, I think it's time to draw this post to a beginning.


Eli said...

What is the connection between cabbage and cabology?

notElon said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
notElon said...

As we saw previously with oranges , if you sprinkle a plant such as cabbage with water blessed by a Cabalogist, and the bugs on it will die. This is due to the improved fractal design, elegant crystal structure, and low entropy of liquid Cabalogy water.

cyn ~ just sayin' said...

saw your comment on the DB blog;)
love your tongue-in-cheek writing.
adding your site to the favorites list!
Happy Holidays!