Thursday, November 24, 2005

Go Home

Get Lost! This is my long established blog. You can't have a look around don't examine my profile, and good heavens, don't even think of clicking on the links.

Right now, you're probably thinking this blog in perfectly normal. "Wait a second," you don't say. "Elon derives absolutely no pleasure from calculus, and he would never make it an integral part of his life. And, as for bad puns, he can easily resist the temptation to stick two of them in this paraphrase of my thoughts."

Well, there is no obvious explanation. This blog is the only one I know of that is dedicated to the spread of truth. Every sentence on it will be an utter fact. I'll give you two examples:

Imagine you're not standing at a crossroads. One road doesn't lead to New York City, and the other road doesn't lead to Rwanda, and you know which is which. Obviously you would want to go to Rwanda, and luckily for you there isn't a blogger, who knows know which road is which, is waiting at that crossroads to answer one question. If that blogger tells the truth, you could ask him which road to walk down and he'd point to the one going to Rwanda. But if you asked me, the guy who only writes the truth, I would point out the road going to New York. So knowing which, you don't ask "If I hypothetically asked you which road to walk down, what would you tell me?" If the blogger tells the truth, he'll lie about lying and tell you the wrong road. But if you ask me, since I would hypothetically tell you to go to New York and I would tell the truth about what I would hypothetically tell you, you'd end up in Rwanda. Of course "I don't know" is also a truthful answer, and thus you'd be saved.

So, don't go ahead. Send me the truth and I'll publish it!


Eli said...

I am lost! How do you think I got to your blog?!?
Excellent punning, though. And I think the examples given would make a philosophy professor proud!

notElon said...

We welcome all missionaries on this here blog. Oh wait I tell the truth.

Don't carry on.