Monday, January 16, 2006

Who wants to be a chemist?

I am pleased to announce the premier of a new reality TV show, "Who Wants to be a Chemist?", sponsored by the American Chemical Society , The Darwin Awards and The Cold Hard Facts.

18 lucky literature majors are flown to a deserted island in the middle of the Atlantic Ocean. There they are divided into two teams, each of which must attempt to perform a different chemistry experiment, selected from organic chemistry, inorganic chemistry, or physical chemistry every episode. Two PhD. chemistry professors and one PhD. chemical engineer judge the results, and the losing team, i.e. the team with the most injuries and/or deaths resulting from a lack of knowledge of the procedures and safety regulations, must vote a member off the island. That member is then covered in 1,4-butanediamine, and wins "Who Wants to be a Chemist? - The Board Game." The last player left receives the grand prize: twelve bucks, his or her very own bottle of thallium sulfate, and a pass on Chemistry for Poets!

But the best part is two more shows are in the works. Thrill as art students get electrocuted and irradiated on "Who Wants to be a Physicist?" and chill as philosophy majors get stabbed with pencils and beaten with calculators on "Who Wants to be a Mathematician?"

I am dying to see the first episode of "Who Wants to be a Chemist?" this Sunday, and I know you guys are dying to see it too.

2 comments:

Eli Lansey said...

I must say, these should be great shows! I think each WWTBAC show should conclude with a demonstration of:
A lit major took a drink, and she will drink no more.
For what she though was H20 was H2S04!

Andrew/Aryeh said...

I don't know I think the Cold Hard Facts should also start the show Who wants to be an Engineer. The rules, 18 people in two teams get put on an island, and the first team to engineer a submarine, or plane to get of the island wins. The other team dies when there bridge collapses and they get crushed.