Due to the recent uproar about Wal-mart enlisting bloggers for its propaganda campaign, I feel it is only right for me to give the Cold Hard Facts about my sponsors.
First of all, that article I wrote about Irish diets being the key to effective weight loss was not my own work. The Idaho Potato farmers Association gave me discount potatoes to say that. And when I randomly said that Wise made the best potato chips, well I was paid to say that too. And on a less potato related note, when I said Exxon-Mobil captains can't steer their ships very well, I did it because Citgo wired me $1,000 dollars. I regret taking their money now, and resolve not to do any more.
And therein lies the difference between me and those blogs in the Wal-mart Scandal, because unlike those morons, I got paid for writing propaganda. And while we are on that subject, companies if you send me $10, I am your mouthpiece. But I digress, writing corporate propaganda, is wrong, and those guys should be ashamed for being Wal-mart's mouthpieces and should probably kill themselves over it. At least over the fact that they didn't wiggle anything out of Wal-mart, not even free potatoes. I wouldn't have done it because I know you trust me to bring you only the Cold Hard Facts.
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I sent you $10 to advertise my plan for world domination, and to tell all your readers that no one can stop my takeover so to embrace my rule. All I got was this lousy tee-shirt whichi had to pay $30 for.
"I was scamed by The Cold Hard Facts and all I got was this lousy tee-shirt"
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