Thursday, January 07, 2010

New Direction?

I stopped writing on this blog, because I was tired of all the "fan mail" I was getting. I would divide this mail into three categories.

1) Crazies who were happy I agreed with them and were too dumb to realize I was joking.
2) Crazies who were outraged I disagreed with the establishment and were too dumb to realize I was joking.
3) Silence in vast quantities.

Naturally, this gave me a rather cynical view of human nature.

It was also tiring to to lie all the time, so I pretty much let it die.

But lately, I have got the urge to write again, so I may post something soon, provided I get permission. Meanwhile, I leave you with updates and a quote.

Update 1: It turns out that David Radius Hudson's wonder drug is still around. The company recently sent me a prospectus detailing all the generations before Eve. They basically include every hot goddess who ever commissioned a nude portrait. There was also a long, rambling article about how hot those ancestors were. I will not be reprinting that link. It also turns out that Ol' Radius wasn't lying when he said that White Powder Gold is produced from the dirt in his barn. I received a sad story about a young woman who followed her eccentric doctor's advice and injected it into her arm. She promptly died of septic shock.

Update 2: I checked back on Yahoo Answers. It it still possible to check progress through college semesters by the questions that appear in the forums. On the math forum, for example, you can track posts from limits, up through derivatives, to optimizations, to integrals, and it repeats every semester.

Update 3: JuicyCampus officially died quietly in its sleep. It has been replaced with a blog that manages to update less frequently than this one. collegeacb is still around and antisemitic as ever. College newspapers learned their lesson, and this time, they wisely declined to dance on JuicyCampus's grave. Jimmy Wintergreen is still awesome.

Update 4: The perpetual motion machine dude is still around. No it's not done yet. But, yes, you can still send him more money. Tell him I sent you.

Update 5: Even that live forever magnet weirdo is still around. Perhaps, he really did discover the secret to immortality.

The quote: "Is that a toothbrush?"
Yes. Yes it was.


Eli said...

I hope you do post again on occasion. Always good fun. The comments, especially, are entertaining.

痛苦 said...
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